I’ve always found it strange when people make assumptions and are afraid of asking direct questions. Most people seem to think I’m gay. I never correct anyone. I let them live in their world of assumptions. I quietly mind my own business and simply do things for myself.
It’s the simplest way to fuck with people who assume everything. My whole family has been assuming I’m gay my entire life. I never tell them who I’m hanging out with and always use them/they to keep my family in the dark.
My family assumes I’m hanging out with a bunch of guys. One day I’ll bring all my friends over and I’ll have the pleasure of introducing them to the gang of lesbians I hang out with that just walked through the front door.
My family assumes I’m hanging out with a bunch of guys. One day I’ll bring all my friends over and I’ll have the pleasure of introducing them to the gang of lesbians I hang out with that just walked through the front door.
But then they’ll think they were just holding the Gaydar™ upside-down!
My closest friend in my friend group keeps calling me a lesbian and honestly that fucks with my head. I even told another close friend about that and she agrees and that isn’t helping me at all.
I’m finally going to mention this to my therapist soon and I’m kinda afraid she’ll lowkey agree too and that this is just another thing I have to accept? Things have been happening for the last year and they keep happening and I don’t know how to process any of this. It feels like insanity but I’m also happy?
There’s a reason why my reddit/lemmy/piefed usernames always have the word confused in it because what the fuck…
Sorry, I’m not sure I understand ._. Why does being called a lesbian by some of your friends “fuck with your head”? Are you feeling some level of gender dysphoria, or…?
I look, act and present myself as a guy. I’ve never felt any gender dysphoria and have been completely fine with people assuming I’m a gay guy.
I guess there’s a whole lot that’s happened in the last year of my life that’s made little sense in comparison to my whole life before that where I’ve generally been surrounded by guys acting like manly men. Well that didn’t make much sense either. I think I’m just eternally confused.
Sounds to me like someone is misgendering you as a joke? Doesn’t sound nice to do it to a cis person for the same reasons it’s viewed as an asshole move for a trans person.
As a straight cis who also finds themselves with lots of LGBTQ friends, I have never had someone say something like that to me.
I guess it depends on the people. Our little group are quite open with each other and she means it in an affectionate way.
We met in an unexpected way but we have the same taste in music, we nerd out on electronics together, we enjoy the same activities out, we both try to be vegan and cook together. We also have similar views on openness in relationships so we kiss, cuddle, and hold hands. Her partner who is also in this group enjoys seeing us enioy each other. It honestly seems like her way of including me in this lesbian group and means no harm.
She knows how little names and labels means to me. They all do. I’ve been called everything from gay to princess and never bothered to correct anyone. Because I do more than I say, people will abruptly find out how I’m not as easily definable as they thought and it always has some widely different but interesting results.
My other friend thinks it’s cute and enjoys seeing me happy, considering how we both went through some dark times together. We both sort of trauma bonded over how men mistreated the both of us in our own ways.
It’s confusing because I spent most of my life being bullied by men and I would have never expected this situation I’m currently in to have ever happened. These are people who not only accept me but are genuinely happy that I am who I am and never broke my ethics or values because of how I was mistreated by my family or by so many men.
I’ve met people like this before but that was always when I traveled. Those relationships come and go quickly. This is the first time where it’s lasted longer than a couple weeks or a few months.
I’ve gotta say it beats me lol. I’m just consistently amazed at the sheer diversity in people. I guess I’m also overlooking a little bit how confusing it must be for some. You were born female, yet you identify/are comfortable being addressed as a dude, and are attracted to women? I don’t know what that makes you. Maybe… just “you”
To be fair, directly asking if somebody is gay would feel slightly confrontational to me. If I was sat with any of my friends, and somebody asked if we were gay, unless it was very clear that they held positive intentions I would assume something unpleasant was possibly about to happen. Not like, full on assault probably but certainly at least some bullshit.
I’ve always found it strange when people make assumptions and are afraid of asking direct questions. Most people seem to think I’m gay. I never correct anyone. I let them live in their world of assumptions. I quietly mind my own business and simply do things for myself.
It’s the simplest way to fuck with people who assume everything. My whole family has been assuming I’m gay my entire life. I never tell them who I’m hanging out with and always use them/they to keep my family in the dark.
My family assumes I’m hanging out with a bunch of guys. One day I’ll bring all my friends over and I’ll have the pleasure of introducing them to the gang of lesbians I hang out with that just walked through the front door.
But then they’ll think they were just holding the Gaydar™ upside-down!
My closest friend in my friend group keeps calling me a lesbian and honestly that fucks with my head. I even told another close friend about that and she agrees and that isn’t helping me at all.
I’m finally going to mention this to my therapist soon and I’m kinda afraid she’ll lowkey agree too and that this is just another thing I have to accept? Things have been happening for the last year and they keep happening and I don’t know how to process any of this. It feels like insanity but I’m also happy?
There’s a reason why my reddit/lemmy/piefed usernames always have the word confused in it because what the fuck…
Sorry, I’m not sure I understand ._. Why does being called a lesbian by some of your friends “fuck with your head”? Are you feeling some level of gender dysphoria, or…?
I look, act and present myself as a guy. I’ve never felt any gender dysphoria and have been completely fine with people assuming I’m a gay guy.
I guess there’s a whole lot that’s happened in the last year of my life that’s made little sense in comparison to my whole life before that where I’ve generally been surrounded by guys acting like manly men. Well that didn’t make much sense either. I think I’m just eternally confused.
Sounds to me like someone is misgendering you as a joke? Doesn’t sound nice to do it to a cis person for the same reasons it’s viewed as an asshole move for a trans person. As a straight cis who also finds themselves with lots of LGBTQ friends, I have never had someone say something like that to me.
I guess it depends on the people. Our little group are quite open with each other and she means it in an affectionate way.
We met in an unexpected way but we have the same taste in music, we nerd out on electronics together, we enjoy the same activities out, we both try to be vegan and cook together. We also have similar views on openness in relationships so we kiss, cuddle, and hold hands. Her partner who is also in this group enjoys seeing us enioy each other. It honestly seems like her way of including me in this lesbian group and means no harm.
She knows how little names and labels means to me. They all do. I’ve been called everything from gay to princess and never bothered to correct anyone. Because I do more than I say, people will abruptly find out how I’m not as easily definable as they thought and it always has some widely different but interesting results.
My other friend thinks it’s cute and enjoys seeing me happy, considering how we both went through some dark times together. We both sort of trauma bonded over how men mistreated the both of us in our own ways.
It’s confusing because I spent most of my life being bullied by men and I would have never expected this situation I’m currently in to have ever happened. These are people who not only accept me but are genuinely happy that I am who I am and never broke my ethics or values because of how I was mistreated by my family or by so many men.
I’ve met people like this before but that was always when I traveled. Those relationships come and go quickly. This is the first time where it’s lasted longer than a couple weeks or a few months.
I’ve gotta say it beats me lol. I’m just consistently amazed at the sheer diversity in people. I guess I’m also overlooking a little bit how confusing it must be for some. You were born female, yet you identify/are comfortable being addressed as a dude, and are attracted to women? I don’t know what that makes you. Maybe… just “you”
Oh no, I’m a guy, dangly bits and all. I guess I forgot to mention that before.
I’ve just never gave much care for labels so I kinda forget what’s important for a full conversation.
Maybe I’m the one that’s confusing hahaha
Haha… Your two friends calling you a lesbian are the most confusing of us all.
Did they try setting it to Wumbo?
To be fair, directly asking if somebody is gay would feel slightly confrontational to me. If I was sat with any of my friends, and somebody asked if we were gay, unless it was very clear that they held positive intentions I would assume something unpleasant was possibly about to happen. Not like, full on assault probably but certainly at least some bullshit.