Private Investigator results. Divine conception sounds sus.
Non fungible tokens
Fentanyl.
Oh, thank god it wasn’t Tylenol.
I brought a nicely written certificate saying their Christmas present was that a donation had been made in their name. None of them could read. It didn’t go over well.
A pickled cucumber
Baby Oil
Glock w a switch
Crucify THIS motherfucker!
Brrrrraaappp…
Weed
A pack of disposable diapers. They understandably looked at me weird because they hadn’t been invented yet.
Well that does explain why in the Book of Mormon, Jesus dies at 63 of microplastic related lung cancer. 63. Too young.
Weed. Buncha squares, those Wise Guys.
A mother***king MERRY CHRYSLER
Didn’t he drive them out in his Fury, or was that someone else?
Or maybe that’s a Dodge…
Something he could really use: A book full of web links to articles about “how to start your own religion”.
Perhaps I should have just given him a Post-It note that said “Dude, just use ChatGPT”!
deleted by creator
The means to properly document Jesus’ existence so that we had even one shred of actual evidence that any of this stuff happened.
ancestry.com dna kit
