homes

:(

So, Dick, how long did it take you to dig it out of your ass?

That’s part of the joke: you can’t order just 20 or 50 or 100 hair ties. You have to order in quantities of 1000+

Still, only, like, $8 for 5,000 (assorted colors)

(It’s an awesome quinceanera gift!)

Clank-ah

Never doubt that the Trump administration will always be the most petty cunts you could ever imagine.

I ordered you a dozen hair ties on Amazon.

You’re welcome.

These would-be assassins are so very disappointing

It’s also the critical fuel used by most time travel devices. So…

Coo coo cachoo!

I’ve definitely gotten sauces delivered to me this way.

Living until 2026

Maduro was the second time. The first time was Noriega with Bush 1.

So as someone who identifies as male, I don’t have these stupid hang ups about expressing emotions. I’m perfectly fine, letting people know how I feel. I try to respect, social decorum and to be polite, but I don’t hold back my emotions because of my gender expression.

FWIW, I’ve met plenty of women who are ice cold, and hold back their emotions, seeing them as some kind of weakness. I think that’s absurd.

Emotional repression is one of the quickest roads to emotional dysfunction.

Are you hallucinating?

“I have the best impeachment, the most impeachment, nobody gets impeached like me!”

— you know who

Are you even capable of tying your own shoes?

I wasn’t arguing that anyone should break the law. Especially considering that that’s why I’m so upset in the first place.

There are plenty of legitimate ways to do it, I just doubt that anyone currently in power has the temerity to try.

I was expressing my cynicism, not a call to revolution.

Oh. I didn’t know it was that complicated.

Fresh Sprite is the only reason I would ever go into McDonald’s.

Sometimes I wonder how people like you make it through a day without choking on your own tongue